Listen, God is faithful. He is so faithful! I have been getting filled up since December of last year by a church in Huntsville called Family Faith Church. Dr. Tim Storey, who is a life coach to the stars in Hollywood, has been coming and filling my heart with truth and life. He has helped reestablish who I am in the Spirit and through the Holy Spirit, has been healing a part of me that I had given up on. My children have been one of my upmost concerns as they are going through this divorce with me. It has not been all glorious. Ron is still very controlling and tries to manipulate situations to his advantage. Suprise, suprise. It has been very difficult to know what to do with Jesse. Jesse's heart is for his daddy to love him unconditionally. He listens to all of Ron's stuff and soaks it into his soul to try and fix, to try and control himself. It is very disheartening and fearful. I am taking a stand in the spirit for Jesse's whole heart. I cannot be defeated when it comes to my children. God wants them fully whole and I have to know that the Jesus I am putting in them is enough to overcome the negetive attitudes that their dad lives with. It has been a battle. God is the victor!!!

Last night during Tim Storey, Jesse raised his hands to worship the Lord! Now this is the second time...ever in his lifetime that I have seen him broken before the Lord. Tim asked that we put our hands on our neighbors shoulders to pray for each other and Jesse prayed for me and the man next to him prayed for him. I spotted the tear that rolled down his face...I wanted to capture that tear. To put it in a special place to use it to wash over his hurt with life. But I know my God, and that He has done just that!! This little victory is enough to keep me flying high for a while.

This morning as I was praying for Jesse I realized that his self esteem is very low. He doesn't see how beautiful and smart, and athletic, and awesome he is. I am praying that God will show him. He has favor, as do all of my children, but he is not in a place where he sees it. Please pray for him. I feel like the shepard who has abandoned his other sheep to go after the lost one. We have Jesse in our hook though and are making him lie in green pastures and drink from cool waters to restore his soul.

On a fun note... as a result of my speaking at Gene and Sharon's church, they took up a magnificent offering for me. That was very humbling but I have been praying about what to do with the money. $500 went towards my house and car insurance which had lapsed... Now we have the world's required insurance again. With the remainder, I was able to buy Rebecca a calculator that she has been needing for 2 years, and a skirt and heels for FFA and Jesse a pair of Nike basketball shoes that he needs. I am also going to give Becca $40 for a softball helmet that her coach wants her to buy. The rest will probably pay a bill and help with our travels to watch Eliza play softball this weekend. Please don't ever let it be said or thought of me again that I am not taking care of my kids needs and desires. They really don't want much, just basics in life, and out of fear I have not provided all of those in the past. While they have dealt with it through the years, it has hurt my kids and made them think the Our Father is poverty minded.... HE IS NOT A POVERTY MINDED GOD. I will live in His Riches and believe for his best and know that our Father gives good gifts to his children! Help me with this Lord. Help me bless my kids.
I need more faith Lord, you said if I would ask, you would give more faith... I'm asking.